Tuesday, April 2, 2013


For me Anxiety comes in spurts. I'll be fine for a year and suddenly have the worst month of my life. I found this post here on Tumblr describing and explaining anxiety. It's perfect and amazing and sooo accurate. I just had to share it with all of you.
things we (people with anxiety) are trying to do all the time:
  • 1. be safe
things we can’t help but do all the time:
  • 1. second-guess ourselves
  • 2. behave impulsively and reactively
  • 3. take everything personally
  • 4. worry
  • 5. worry
  • 6. worry
  • 7. have difficulty accepting compliments
  • 8. have difficulty reciprocating friendly gestures
  • 9. have difficulty finding the courage to respond
  • 10.  have difficulty not being suspicious of others’ intentions
  • 11.  make a huge deal out of the smallest thing
things you should keep in mind:
  • 1. we’re scared of everything
  • 2. pretty much all of the time
  • 3. it’s an actual disorder
  • 4. it manifests as impulsive behavior
  • 5. you can’t fix us with words
  • 6. telling us “worrying is silly” won’t make us stop worrying
  • 7. it’ll only make us feel silly
  • 8. and then we’ll worry even more
  • 9. “oh god, am i worrying too much? what if she calls me silly again?”
  • 10.  like that
  • 11.  also, we wear a lot of armor
  • 12.  cold, heavy, affection-proof armor with spikes
  • 13.  we constructed this armor as children
  • 14.  we’re fairly certain you will never be able to pry it apart
  • 15.  but there is a nice person under there, we promise

things you can do for a friend with an anxiety disorder:
  • 1. stick around
  • 2. ask him/her if they’re comfortable in a place or situation
  • 3. be willing to change the place or situation if not
  • 4. activities that help them take their mind off of things are good!
  • 5. talk to them even when they might not talk back
  • 6. (they’re probably too afraid to say the wrong thing)
  • 7. try not to take they’re reactions (or lack thereof) personally
  • 8. (the way they expresses themselves are distorted and bent because of their constant fear)
  • 9. (and they knows this)
  • 10.  give her time to respond to you
  • 11.  they will obsess over how she is being interpreted
  • 12.  they will anticipate being judged
  • 13.  it took me four hours just to type this much
  • 14.  even though i sound casual
  • 15.  that’s because i have an anxiety disorder
things you shouldn’t do:
  • 1. tell us not to worry
  • 2. tell us we’ll be fine
  • 3. mistake praise for comfort
  • 4. ask us if we are “getting help”
  • 5. force us to be social
  • 6. force us to do things that trigger us
  • 7. “face your fears” doesn’t always work
  • 8. because—remember—scared of everything
  • 9. in fact, it would be more accurate to say we are scared of the fear itself
emergency action procedure for panic attacks:
  • 1. be calm
  • 2. be patient
  • 3. don’t be condescending
  • 4. remind us that we’re not crazy
  • 5. sit with us
  • 6. ask us to tighten and relax our muscles one by one
  • 7. remind us that we are breathing
  • 8. engage us in a discussion (if we can talk, then we can breathe)
  • 9. if we are having trouble breathing, try getting us to exhale slowly
  • 10.  or breathe through our nose
  • 11.  or have us put our hands on our stomach to feel each breath
  • 12.  ask us what needs to change in our environment in order for us to feel safe
  • 13.  help us change it
  • 14.  usually, just knowing that we have someone on our side willing to fight our scary monsters with us is enough to calm us down
if you have an anxiety disorder:
  • 1. it’s okay.
  • 2. even if you worry that it’s not okay.
  • 3. it’s still okay. it’s okay to be scared. it’s okay to be scared of being scared.
  • 4. you are not crazy. you are not a freak.
  • 5. i know there’s a person under all that armor.
  • 6. and i know you feel isolated because of it.
  • 7. i won’t make you take it off.
  • 8. but know that you are not alone.

Seriously, if you know sombody with anxiety, follow these guidlines. If you have anxiety "I know there's a person under all that armor... I won't make you take it off, but know that you are not alone."

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